Do you want to Help Your Teen Succeed?

The news recently said that for your child to be a SUCCESSFUL KID, household chores are the KEY! 

When they begin college, or move in with a roommate or friend while working a summer job, or working elsewhere, they will want to know the following: 

a) How to do their own laundry, fold their clothes, and have them ready for work or school, pick up their clothes, make their bed, and clean and organize their room or space. 

b) How to make a menu, a grocery list, shop for their own groceries and personal items and eat a balanced diet. A diet of healthy drinks (non-carbonated, non-caffeine), 1/2 vegetables and fruit, 1/4 carbohydrates, and 1/4 protein, plus 2 T of healthy oils. Things like olives and olive oil, butter, and avocado. Change diet by reducing sugar, fat, and salt, and replacing junk food snacks with cranberries, raisins, nuts, and apples, etc. 

c) How to boil water for macaroni & cheese, cook scrambles eggs, and cook or microwave frozen or fresh vegetables. How to fix foods they like and would want to share with someone else. How to clean and chop vegetables, and make a salad, tuna salad, and meat and vegetable soup using diced chicken or hamburger, vegetable broth, and any vegetables around. Maybe roast a turkey for dinner at the Holiday! 

d) How to vacuum, sweep, and wash the floors, and outdoor walkways. How to dust, wash dishes and pans, wipe the counters, and bathrooms. How to work in the yard, care for plants and a garden, and clean a car, wither it’s yours, or one they might eventually get to have. 

e) If you can, help them to itemize their spending keeping a record of date & amount of what they’ve earned or received, what they’ve bought, and what they have left or owe. Eventually help them learn how to balance a checkbook, pay bills, and especially how to Save. 

They will be more popular if they are the one who knows how to do these things and the ones who act like “responsible and accomplished TEENS” while going about their day. 

The news also said that 82 percent of today’s’ parents did chores around the house, but today only 28 percent of them require their kids to do the same or similar chores. Give them your time and share in the work together! 

HELP THEM! You may need to work around their extra activities, sports, and entertainment, but do find time each day, to do something with them! Sit down together and make a list to check-off, and as they acquire each skill and task, give them some sort of reward, or acknowledgment. 

BE ASSERTIVE and treat them like Young Adults!! Talking Adult to Adult with them assertively. They’ll want to learn more about how to do things, and about how you do things if you make them feel like an equal. Teaching them how to work is enjoyable if you both agree to be kind and friendly as the older adult and the younger adult. This really is helping them!! 

Ask them not to argue with you because they’ll be glad that they get the practice and experience while they’re learning. This is good because the practice and self-discipline will increase their Confidence, and make them popular! Others will be glad they know stuff and they’ll be popular around the house as they take over much of their own maintenance! 

EVERY DAY is a good day to help around the house. Pick things they want to have done, like cooking something they like to eat, or washing their own clothes, to have that certain clothing item clean. They want your attention and your time, although they may not know it. Pick something that they sort of feel like doing, like working outside hosing, or sweeping outside for a while. 

Set up a large planter on the patio with a tomato plant, strawberries or something for them to have to care for. Let them help you do what you are doing! If you have to run the vacuum or load the dishwasher, ask them to do it and hang out with them when you ask them. You can clean the hard places, wipe out cupboards or appliances. 

Remember, they are on this Difficult Road of Transition and that requires them to try harder, as they become a grown-up. 

Each is at different stages and each needs different things, at different times. However, they will all profit from knowing the general household, and self-maintenance skills. You have them for these set amount of years so take advantage of the time together, and give them lessons. 

It will make them more successful in their future, and it will help them find more reasons to love you. Please don’t play “bossy parent”. Be helpful, loving, and patient, but GIVE THEM YOUR TIME in this productive way working together! If you tell them to keep practicing, eventually they’ll do well each time and meet with your standard. 

Your Teen will appreciate the efforts you make, and of working with you at each task. Encourage them to become skillful, in each of these useful areas of self-care, and maintenance. Have fun. Teach them who your “Natural Child” is, by being playful. Or be goofy and use your best foreign accent to manifest a different persona. Role-playing is fun. 

Each time you have time to work together to practice and gain greater skills, you can make a game out of it but giving yourselves different names. You could be Miranda the Maid, or Mike the fixer, and they can be Johnny Cool and Sizzling Sally. When Johnny wants clean clothes, Miranda shows up to help! It’s OK to be silly. 

If they’re looking to earn money, have them go around the neighborhood on a weekend morning and ask for jobs. It gives them public speaking skills, increases their determination, and helps them understand how to accept rejection, without rejection being a negative thing. 

They also learn money management and why we all work for a living. Suggest to them that they offer to do jobs like picking up trash, raking leaves or rocks, sweeping patios & walkways, babysitting, walking dogs, vacuuming inside cars, any cleaning as needed. If they are a good worker the neighbor will probably volunteer to pay them $10 an hour and may even give them a tip because they’re so cool! 

Remind them of the Art of Persuasion! Establish rapport, ask for what you want, ask them what they want, Create Desire by saying something enthusiastic and positive like “This will be great!” or “I think this will good!”, and be specific as you Ask for the Job! Challenge them to Save $100 dollars! 

Here are some additional Challenges and Goals. 

Drink a minimum of (3) three bottles of WATER daily 

2. Get outside for 15 minutes of SUNSHINE, AND EXERCISE or active play. 

3. READ about people they are interested in or who are “like them”. Read about their role models. 

4. Do deep BREATHING every day … stretch for 5 minutes while relaxing. 

5. Eat VEGETABLES and fruits, and pick them before they eat other foods. 

6. WASH their face every night before bed using soap. Rinse face in the morning and add moisturizer. It’ll reduce acne and make them feel fresher. 

Helping your kid or Teen help You will make them successful, and they’ll feel like a STAR!! 

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